No Excuses, No Regrets

I've always been a dreamer.

I can't begin to count the times that I would lay awake in bed and night and tell myself that tomorrow would be the day.
...That I would awaken to a stream of bright sunlight and be exalted to Diet Heaven.
...That I would instantly be a calorie conscious angel- with no cravings, or cheating, or impassioned chocolate dreams.
...That I would get up and get on with it.
...That my body fat would melt away like rancid lard
until all that was left was solid muscle...
(and great boobs).

But I have always been the Queen of Excuses, too.

There's no way I could possibly start my diet until Monday.
Or until I finished off the two cartons of Cadbury Eggs and the five pounds of frozen buffalo wings that called my name in ten second intervals.
Nope, can't do it today- I've got half a cheesecake left, my kids are stressing me out, I don't feel good, and life's too short not to inhale a double order of chili fries.

Of course, the New Year always seemed promising at first- Making resolutions, tossing out bad habits, turning over leaves and burning bridges and all that other stuff that people who have control can manage quite easily.
But that's just it. I was out of control.

New Year's Day was always definitely out as a starting place.
I like my margaritas.
I could almost see myself swell up like a puff fish with alcohol and sodium.
Not to mention the vast array of sneaky snacks that attached themselves like cellulite leeches to my torso.

Okay.
February was out, too.
How could I possibly diet on Groundhog Day?

And then came the all-dreadful Valentines Day. I used to keep the empty heart shaped candy boxes my husband gave me, just so I could sniff the lid once in awhile and get a chocolate high.

Then there's St. Patrick's Day in March. (Green beer and Irish Stew).
April :Easter. (Those deliciously evil chocolate eggs again !)
May: Memorial Day (grilled cheeseburgers, butter lathered roasting ears, that cute red, white and blue patriotic Jello cake).
June: Flag Day (?? I always thought of something!)
July: Independence Day (Brats as big as my arm and chip dip out of this world).
August: Uhhhh....For those of you who don't know- it happens to actually be National Picnic Month. (Fried chicken, baby!)
September: Of course- the good-ol food-laden Labor Day weekend! (Cold beer, barbecue, and pie!)
October: Halloween (Candy everywhere!)
November: Thanksgiving ( Well, you can imagine the whole spread without my help).
December: Christmas (Cookies, cakes, and every possible treat before the New Year starts).

But this time it's different.
No, I'm not an angel yet.
I am still drawn toward the foods that aren't the best choices, but I study them a long, long time before I do something I'll regret. It always helps me to go away and busy myself for thirty minutes or so or look at weight loss success stories on YouTube.
Then, go back to the kitchen - look at that Danish roll -and spit on it!

I can't make excuses anymore.
I can't try to justify eating binges or extra helpings.
I can't keep dreaming that it will all happen overnight.

Because, you know, it is a journey.
Every single day there's a twist in the road or rain pouring down.
But let strength be your umbrella.
Let your heart be your guide.

Get up and get on with it!
Let no excuses keep you
from your heaven.