Just Clowning Around

I'm all for doing research when
confronted with the unknown
or when I begin an activity or project
that that I have questions about.

Just like this weight loss thing.
I've been studying ways
to at least look thinner
until I can actually be thinner.

The experts say that one way
is tricks with makeup.
They claim that eye makeup
can make your eyes appear larger-
thus causing your face
to appear smaller.

And make sure to give your lips
and cheeks some added color
and powder your nose.

Okay.
The bigger your eyes,
the smaller your face.
Got that.

Then the same concept should be used
when choosing a hairstyle.
The more lift and volume to your hair-
the smaller your face seems.

Simple.
Big hair=Smaller face.

Of course we all know the clothing factor
in looking thinner.
White is out.
Vertical stripes instead of horizontal.
Darker color on bottom.
No pleats or big pockets.
Supportive underwear.
No belly tops.

But I do feel that if your
personality is young and vibrant
then your clothing should reflect that.
No use constantly wearing black.
Someone once told me that
if you paint a barn black- it's still gonna be a barn!
So, lighten up.

So, after thorough research,
I instantly tried all the
above hints and tips.

How do I look?