A Little Dab'L Do Ya

Diet Know-it-Alls came up with
a clever spray-on salad dressing
a few years ago.
And since I was always one to try
innovative products that
would aid in my weight loss,
I purchased several in various flavors.

I prepared a huge healthy salad-
all the while anticipating
the first savory bite
that would sparkle my taste buds
but stay off of my waist.

I shot a mist of Italian spray
on my mound of lettuce.

I looked closer.

Was that it?

I pumped out another few spritzes-
not sure any of them made contact
with the target.
Then I tasted a slice of cucumber
that couldn't possibly have
avoided the vinegar shower,
and realized it was still dry
and unappealing.

I sprayed.
And sprayed.
And sprayed.
Half a bottle later, I began to see
a wet glaze over my vegetables
and they started to taste somewhat palatable.

I soon ditched that dandy diet discovery.

Now someone has invented a food spray
called Flavor Spray.
(Catchy name, isn't it? Bet those guys spent
a lot of sleepless nights coming up with that one.)
Zero calories, zero cholesterol,
zero carbs and zero fat.
Yep-A true dieter's dream!

Like the salad spray, the Flavor Spray
can be misted over bland tasting foods
to make them taste better.
Your turkey a little dry?
Pump on the Turkey Flavor Spray
and you've got a virtual Thanksgiving feast!
How about a bit of Memphis BBQ Flavor Spray
on that dull tofu burger?
Or a blast of Cheesecake Spray
on that lo-fat cottage cheese?

The possibilities are endless.
So are the flavors.

According to the press release from Flavor Spray, the sprays are categorized into four taste-bud-tempting groups: Classic, Exotic, Sweet & Sinful, and Fruit.

For example,tempting Sweet & Sinful flavors include: Banana Split Spray, Birthday Cake Spray, Chocolate Fudge Spray, Cookies & Cream Spray, Marshmallow Spray, Mocha Spray, Raspberry Bubblegum Spray, Root Beer Float Spray, Strawberry Shortcake Spray, Cheesecake Spray, Apple Pie Spray, Raspberry Chocolate Truffle, Coconut Spray.

Sorry, but a shot of Banana Split Spray
on my fat free yogurt just doesn't cut it.
Gonna need a bigger bottle
and a garden hose to sell me on that one!